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 Post subject: HAHA THIS IS HILARIOUS
PostPosted: February 25th, 2004, 8:41 pm 
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from http://www.ananova.com/news/story/sm_870483.html

Steel bridge stolen in Ukraine

An 11-metre-long steel bridge has been dismantled and stolen in western Ukraine.

Police say locals are behind the theft of the bridge that used to span the river Svalyavka.

Officers said it would have been impossible to take the bridge apart without a crane and a lorry. They also say it would have been difficult to have taken it away unnoticed.

BBC News Online says metal theft is a problem in Ukraine, where people steal statues, wires and sewage hatches to sell as scrap.

Officials are now checking all scrap metal yards in the region to find the remains of the one-tonne bridge.

Meanwhile, residents of several villages along the river have to find another way of reaching the local town, Svalyava.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: February 25th, 2004, 8:43 pm 
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LOL That's dedication. How can someone steal an entire bridge?




Well-if you've ever heard the saying "I have a bridge I'd like to sell you"
Now it can happen. :evil:

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: February 25th, 2004, 8:44 pm 
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Location: Wiltshire, England ..................... .....Justice 4 The 96..... ..........Y.N.W.A............
We get fuck all for scrap metal over here......

Its cheaper to pay someone else to take it away :|

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: February 25th, 2004, 8:47 pm 
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rockin_plumber wrote:
We get fuck all for scrap metal over here......

Its cheaper to pay someone else to take it away :|


now you can see that you cam expotr it to ukraine

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: February 25th, 2004, 8:49 pm 
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Location: Wiltshire, England ..................... .....Justice 4 The 96..... ..........Y.N.W.A............
MaidenMadness wrote:
now you can see that you cam expotr it to ukraine


Ok we can share it 50/50 :wink:

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: February 25th, 2004, 8:49 pm 
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Location: Wiltshire, England ..................... .....Justice 4 The 96..... ..........Y.N.W.A............
I got an 11 metre long bridge here :wink:

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: February 25th, 2004, 8:53 pm 
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rockin_plumber wrote:
I got an 11 metre long bridge here :wink:
LOL LOL


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: March 5th, 2004, 11:08 am 
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dinner party conversation
WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"


WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."

WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"

HUSBAND: "I guess so."
WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
WIFE: - - - silence - - -

HUSBAND: "SHIT"


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: March 6th, 2004, 1:40 pm 
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Location: Devon, England
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect
courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course,
perfect.
One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple were driving
their perfect car along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the
side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help.
There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to
disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded
Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along
delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated
and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them
survived the accident.

Question: Who was the survivor?
(Scroll down for the answer. Trust me, it's worth it)



















Answer:
The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the
first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such
thing as a perfect man.
**** Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.
**** Men keep scrolling.
























So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must have
been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.

By the way, if you're a woman and you're still reading, this illustrates
another point: Women never listen.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: March 6th, 2004, 2:53 pm 
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wicker nomad wrote:
dinner party conversation
WIFE: "What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?
HUSBAND: "Definitely not!"


WIFE: "Why not - don't you like being married?"
HUSBAND: "Of course I do."
WIFE: "Then why wouldn't you remarry?"
HUSBAND: "Okay, I'd get married again."
WIFE: "You would? (with a hurtful look on her face)."
HUSBAND: (makes audible groan).
WIFE: "Would you sleep with her in our bed?"
HUSBAND: "Where else would we sleep?"
WIFE: "Would you replace my pictures with hers?"
HUSBAND: "That would seem like the proper thing to do."

WIFE: "Would you play golf with her?"

HUSBAND: "I guess so."
WIFE: "Would she use my golf clubs?"
HUSBAND: "No, she's left-handed."
WIFE: - - - silence - - -

HUSBAND: "SHIT"

LOL LOL LOL LMAO

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: March 6th, 2004, 2:55 pm 
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wicker nomad wrote:
Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect
courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course,
perfect.
One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple were driving
their perfect car along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the
side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help.
There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to
disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded
Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along
delivering the toys. Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated
and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them
survived the accident.

Question: Who was the survivor?
(Scroll down for the answer. Trust me, it's worth it)



















Answer:
The perfect woman survived. She's the only one who really existed in the
first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such
thing as a perfect man.
**** Women stop reading here, that is the end of the joke.
**** Men keep scrolling.
























So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the woman must have
been driving. This explains why there was a car accident.

By the way, if you're a woman and you're still reading, this illustrates
another point: Women never listen.

STOP!! Your killing me LOL LOL LOL

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: March 6th, 2004, 6:34 pm 
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taken from ananova.com

Steel thieves at it again in Ukraine

There has been another steel theft in Ukraine - just a week after an 11-metre steel bridge was stolen.

This time thieves targeted an historic steam locomotive from an open-air museum in the city of Donetsk in the east of the country.

The local police chief told a television channel those responsible had probably hired a crane from the state transport company using forged documents authorising the locomotive to be moved to a new location.

It was found at a metal scrap yard outside the city, already cut into pieces. The locomotive was said to be the first ever built in Soviet Ukraine back in 1924, so experts could not put a price tag on it, says BBC News Online.

But the thieves could have expected to earn about £2,200 from selling the 14.5 tonnes of scrap metal that remained of the locomotive. Experts doubt it could ever be put back together.

Metal theft is a serious issue in Ukraine, where statues, wires and even sewage hatches have been stolen for sale as scrap.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: March 7th, 2004, 2:41 pm 
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MaidenMadness wrote:
taken from ananova.com

Steel thieves at it again in Ukraine

There has been another steel theft in Ukraine - just a week after an 11-metre steel bridge was stolen.

This time thieves targeted an historic steam locomotive from an open-air museum in the city of Donetsk in the east of the country.

The local police chief told a television channel those responsible had probably hired a crane from the state transport company using forged documents authorising the locomotive to be moved to a new location.

It was found at a metal scrap yard outside the city, already cut into pieces. The locomotive was said to be the first ever built in Soviet Ukraine back in 1924, so experts could not put a price tag on it, says BBC News Online.

But the thieves could have expected to earn about £2,200 from selling the 14.5 tonnes of scrap metal that remained of the locomotive. Experts doubt it could ever be put back together.

Metal theft is a serious issue in Ukraine, where statues, wires and even sewage hatches have been stolen for sale as scrap.

Weird...

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: March 7th, 2004, 4:40 pm 
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i wonder what will they steel next....they've got a bride, a locomotive, maybe they'll steel railroad tracks next

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: March 7th, 2004, 9:57 pm 
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Location: Devon, England
Please don't under-estimated a mind of a woman!

>A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
>other the silent treatment. Suddenly the man realized that the next day he
>would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business
>flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he
>wrote on a piece of paper,
>
>"Please wake me at 5:00 AM."
>He left it where he knew she would find it.
>
>The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he
>had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife
>hadn't waked him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper
>said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."
>
>Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests


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